How To Save The Airlines

Just the other day, I heard someone say, “If you really want to save the Airlines, you should dump all the male flight attendants. No one wanted them in the first place. Then replace all the female flight attendants with good-looking strippers! What the hell, they don't even serve food anymore, so what's the loss? The strippers would at least triple the alcohol sales and get a 'party atmosphere' going in the cabin. And, of course, every businessman and bored husbands would start flying again, hoping to see some nice naked women.”

And when his friend asked for the economic sense, he continued, “Because of the tips, female flight attendants wouldn't need a salary, thus saving even more money. I suspect tips would be so good that we could charge the women for working the plane and have them kick back 20% of the tips, including lap dances and 'special services.' And Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked women. Hijackings would come to a screeching halt, and the airline industry would see record revenues. This is definitely a win-win situation if we handle it right, a golden opportunity to turn a liability into an asset.”