Cherishing My Privileges

As I've aged, I've become kinder to and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend. I have seen too many dear friends leave this world, too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging. Whose business is it if I choose to read, or play on the computer until 4am? I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 60s, 70s and 80s, and if I, at the same time wish to weep over a lost love, I will. I will walk the beach, in a swim suit that is stretched over a  bulging body, or deemed inappropriate for my age and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the jet set. They too, will get old.

 

I know I am sometimes forgetful. But then again, some of life is just as well forgotten, and eventually, we remember the important things. Sure, over the years, my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break, when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when somebody's beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength, and understanding, and compassion. A heart never broken, is pristine, and sterile, and will never know the joy of being imperfect. I am so blessed to have lived enough to have my hair turning grey, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into grooves on my face. So many have never laughed, and too many have died before their hair could turn silver.

 

As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore. I've even earned the right to be wrong. So, to answer your question, I like being older. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be. And I shall eat dessert every single day and have my favorite drink; if and when I feel like it.

Live A Life Of Gratitude

As humans, it is in our nature to worry. And while we worry about the things we want, we always fail to appreciate, enjoy and be grateful for the things that we have; the countless blessings that we take for granted. So, today and every day,

* Before you say an unkind word, “Think of someone who can't speak.”

* Before you complain about the taste of your food, “Think of someone who has nothing to eat.”

* Before you complain about your spouse, “Think of someone who's daily crying out for a companion.”

* Before you complain about life, “Think of someone who died too young.”

* Before you complain about your children, “Think of someone who desires children but are barren.”

* Before you argue about your dirty house someone didn't keep clean, “Think of the people who are living in the streets.”

* Before whine about the distance you drive, “Think of someone who walks the same distance or more, with their feet.”

* Before you complain about your job, “Think of the unemployed, the disabled, and those who wish they had a job, any job.”

* Before you think of pointing your finger or condemning others, “Remember that not one of us is without blemish, and that we are all answerable to one Creator.”

* And before you allow any depressing thoughts to get you down, “Remember your countless blessings, smile and God for life.”

* Finally, “Feel free to share, for sharing is caring.”

Some Brain Damaging Habits

The brain is one amazing organ in the body. It is the control system for all the activities that happen in your body. It stores all the information on experiences and everything else you have encountered ever since you were born. Just like the heart, the brain is one vital organ as without it, you are basically useless. You can never function properly without it.

 

With the above information in mind, you may think that people will strive to keep it healthy and safe. For sure they do try. But without enough knowledge, you may be doing some things that are causing harm to your brain. Those habits that we adapt and make them part of our lives, yet they are costing us much more as far as our health is concerned. For your brain to stay healthy and function properly, you need to get rid of the following habits.

 

1. Excessive Sugar Intake:

Sugar intake has long been associated with several health complications, from obesity all the way to cancer and other life-threatening conditions. For some reason, we still end up taking excess sugar either knowingly or unknowingly. The effects are heartbreaking. Apart from the many conditions it keeps you at risk of contracting, you may be surprised to know that it also causes damage to your brain over time. This is because, loads of sugar in your bloodstream prevents proteins and nutrients from being absorbed. This results in malnutrition and hinders brain development in the sense that the nutrients it requires to develop and sustain it can no longer be absorbed in the body. The next time you feel enticed to add just another teaspoon of sugar, think of all the harm it will cause you. It is not worth it. Also, try to avoid as much as possible those foods that are high in sugar content.

 

2. Skipping breakfast:

Breakfast is the most important meal of a day. It gears you for the day’s activities and keeps you on track throughout the day. A sad reality in life is that most people tend to ignore it and rather opt to concentrate more on having a heavy lunch and dinner. When you wake up in the morning, you’ve most likely spent more than six-hour in bed without any food. All the food that you had eaten for dinner has already been used to sustain you through the night. Simple logic is you wake up hungry even though you can’t feel it. You need the energy to keep you going, making breakfast an important aspect in your happy mornings. If you skip breakfast over a long period of time, the brain degenerates since it lacks the essential nutrients it requires to function properly. Also, you tend to overeat, making you prone to some lifestyle diseases.

 

3. Multitasking:

It is often said that the good thing about a woman is that she can multitask. Often, you will find women teasing their male counterparts on how better they are for their ability to multitask. But is it really a good thing? A recent study by the Daily Mail found out that those people who multitasked frequently were more likely to suffer from brain damage than those who didn’t. It was seen that the brain tend to shrink when we multitask. One is recommended to follow a stipulated routine to perform their daily activities, one thing at a time. You will not only perform effective work but also save your brain from a lot of troubles.

 

4. Conversing Rarely:

According to research by the World Health Organization (WHO), people who rarely talk may end up suffering from brain damage. This is because the brain cells tend to become dormant making it shrink. On the other hand if you talk indulge in intellectual talks; you tend to stretch your brain, strengthening it in the process. This is essential as far as brain development and growth is concerned. Thinking is like exercise to our bodies. The deeper the thoughts, the more the brain muscles are exercised and the better your brain develops. Watch a movie, read a book but whatever you do, don’t keep your brain inactive.

 

5. Sleep deprivation:

As we sleep, a lot of things happen; our skin renews, and the overall body reenergizes. Sleep is vital for our physical and mental well-being. A recent study by the WHO found that when we sleep, the brain takes this time to cleanse itself by removing all the toxins that might have built up in the brain within the day. Sleep deprivation means this process doesn’t take place thus causing brain damage. It can also lead to the accelerated death of brain cell leading to early memory loss, or Alzheimer’s disease. Having a good night sleep, of about 8 hours per day, is essential to keeping your brain healthy and active.

 

6. Covering Your Head While Sleeping:

Latest world news shows that a large percentage of people are affected by this vice. Who wants to leave their heads open in the cold night? Apparently, when you cover head with a pillow or any other thing as you sleep, there is a buildup of oxygen and carbon dioxide around the head area. When these two are concentrated in one area, inhaling the mixture air leads to brain damage effects. Oxygen deprivation prevents brain growth. In addition, when you inhale a large amount of carbon dioxide, the consequences are dire, not only for your brain but also for your general well-being. Sleeping in a warm room may prevent you from covering your head at night, minimizing this risk.

 

7. Overeating:

Just when you had thought that overeating was already causing a lot of negative health effects to your body, then this? Yeah, get used to it already. Apparently, when you overeat the brain arteries harden, decreasing our mental power. Do I need to add that overeating also causes low self-esteem, weight gain and bloating? I don’t think so. I guess there is no stopping when it comes to overeating as far as threatening our lives is concerned. Avoid this habit as much as you can. Eating a heavy healthy breakfast is a nice way to start.

Some Random Facts_4

1.       Elvis Presley once lived next to an Orthodox rabbi and his wife. On the Saturday Sabbath, he ran errands and turned electronics on and off for them.

2.       In 2012, a Hong Kong business tycoon offered a US$65 million reward for any man who can woo and marry his lesbian daughter.

3.       80% of people are dissatisfied with their jobs.

4.       Couples in which one partner spends 10+ hours more than usual at work divorce at twice the average rate.

5.       More than 13 million working days are lost every year because of stress-related illnesses.

6.       Cats are such picky eaters because they are naturally driven to eat foods with a preferred ratio of protein to fat: 1 to 0.4.

7.       If the U.S. freed all its prisoners except murderers and rapists, it would still have more people in prison per head than Germany.

8.       The longest-running experiment is the pitch drop experiment. A funnel holding a sample of tar pitch sealed in a glass jar shows how some substances that appear solid are actually liquid. It takes 10 years for a single drop to form.

9.       The cost of sequencing a human genome went from US$100 million in 2007 to about US$3,000 in 2012.

10.   As soon as they find a rock to anchor themselves to, young sea squirts eat their own brains.

11.   In 2012, about 42 million Americans had never been married, twice as many as in 1960.

12.   People in Britain who wake in the middle of the night are most likely to do it at 3:44 a.m.

13.   There is a reservoir of water 3 times the volume of all the oceans deep beneath the Earth's surface.

14.   Ancient Greeks investigated animal structure and described the difference between arteries and veins around 500 BCE.

15.   A cabin fire on Apollo 1 killed three astronauts during a launch-pad test in 1967.

16.   An analysis of nearly two-thirds of the world's languages shows that humans tend to use the same sounds for common objects and ideas.

17.   An iPhone has about 75 elements in it — two-thirds of the periodic table.

18.   Jackie Kennedy won an Emmy Award for her televised tour of The White House in 1962.

19.   Alfred Nobel, of the Nobel Prize, lost his brother to an accident at his lab. They were working with liquid nitrogen and attempting to create a more stable explosive. Nobel was able to complete his research after the accident and invented dynamite.

20.   50 beavers were introduced into Tierra del Fuego, Argentina, in the 1940s to help start a fur trade. There are now over 100,000, and they have devastated over 16 million hectares.

21.   The director of the FBI encouraged everyone to cover their webcams in 2016.

22.   In 2012, Catarina Migliorini, a 20 year old Brazilian girl, auctioned off her virginity online for US$780,000.

23.   Only 30 to 50 of the original Apple 1computers still exist, with originals selling for over US$50,000.

24.   Most drivers think they are a better-than-average driver.

25.   The company which maintains Big Ben has staff on 24-hour call should something go wrong.

26.   U.S. taxpayer money was used by the military to pay NFL teams to honor them.

Happiness Is The Way

 We convince ourselves that life will be better after we get married, have a baby, then another. Then we are frustrated that the kids aren't old enough and we'll be more content when they are. After that, we're frustrated that we have teenagers to deal with. We will certainly be happy when they are out of that stage. We tell ourselves that our lives will be complete when our spouse gets his or her act together, when we get a nicer car, when we are able to go on a nice vacation or when we retire. The truth is there's no better time to be happy than right now. If not now, when? Your life will always be filled with challenges.

 

It's best to admit this to yourself and decide to be happy anyway. Happiness is the way. So, treasure every moment that you have and treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time with, and remember that, time waits for no one. So stop waiting, “Until your car or home is paid off. Until you get a new car or home. Until your kids leave the house. Until you go back to school. Until you finish school. Until you lose some weight. Until you gain some weight. Until you get married. Until you get a divorce. Until you have kids. Until you retire, until you die.” There is no better time than right now to be happy. Happiness is a journey, not a destination. So work like you don't need money, love like you've never been hurt, and, dance like no one's watching.

 

Enjoying The Present

Welcome to another beautiful, healthful and love-filled day. May we have the ability to appreciate that when we sacrifice our health and sanity in the pursuit of money in order that we may enjoy the pleasures of the world, we shall eventually sacrifice that money in recuperating our health and sanity.

 

May we never be so anxious about the future which has always been and will always be a mystery that we don’t enjoy the present that is a gift and a reality. And may we never live as if we are never going to die, and then die never really lived.

The Unused Instrument

While on a flight returning from a holiday, a distinguished young lady, said to a priest seated beside her, "Father, may I ask you for a favour?"  And the priest replied, "Of course, my daughter! What may I do for you?" So the lady said, "Well, I bought an expensive electronic hair dryer that is well above my customs limits and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there anyway, you could carry it through Customs for me? Perhaps, say under your robes?" And the priest said, "I would love to help you my daughter, but I must warn you; I will not lie." Then the lady smiled, handed him the dryer and said, "Father, with your honest face, no one will question you."

 

When they got to the Customs, she let the priest go ahead of her. And when the Customs official asked, "Father, do you have anything to declare?" The priest said, "My son, from the top of my head down to my waistline, I have nothing to declare." The official thought this answer was as strange as they come, so he asked, "And what do you have to declare from your waistline, to the bottom of your feet?" And the priest smiled most benevolently, and said, "I have a marvelous little instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which to date, is unused." Roaring with laughter, the official said, "Go ahead, Father! Next!”

Give It Time – Part Two

The wise priest in the Bible, in Acts told them to leave Peter and John, and rather give them time. You can be good in giving people tests and trying out who they are. Some people know how to pass them all but the test of time they fail.

 

*Time tests Love and proves it. *Time tests businesses and authenticates it. *Time tests spirituality and reveals it. *Time tests friendship and uncover true friend. *Time, a good tester.

 

Don't say that NEPA in your area is now the best until you have, “Given it time.”

 

When people say, “You are useless, worthless and won't amount to anything,” just laugh it off and ask them to, “Give you time.”

 

A painful moment brings quietness and quietness gives inspiration for good thinking. When all is well, you don't think of what is next; just, “Give it time.” 

 

When you pass it around, and no one comments; don't assume it was ignored, “Give it time.” 

 

Who you spend most of your time with is who you will end up becoming in life. Stop spending quality time with someone who you don't want to end up being like. The Bible said, “Do not be misled. Bad company corrupts good character.” 1 Corinthians 15:33

 

Mind the kind of people you follow. You can't be hanging around failures and expect to have a successful life. No matter what God has planned for you in life, as long as you keep hanging around failures, you can never be successful. Success begets Success, while failure begets failure.

 

Hang around Successful people who you are aspiring to be like. You might end up being like them. Do you know that you behave like your closest friends, knowingly or unknowingly? You attract traces of their characters into your life and vice versa. 

 

So, mind who you spend your time with. If you are a parent, help your children to choose the right type of friends. Don't just leave them to hang around whoever they want. They may end up being like them.

No matter what God has planned for you in life, one bad company can turn everything upside down.

 

“May we attract the right people into our lives, and reject the wrong ones! May we be guided by God, to meet the right people today!”

Give It Time – Part One

When someone comes and tells you, "I can't sleep without you, I love you the way you are and I can put up with your good and bad attitude", before you commit your heart please, “Give it time.”

 

When you just met someone today and you feel like marrying him/her tomorrow, before you do remember you need to, “Give it time.”

 

When you visit your uncle and you will stay there for 2 months holiday, don't be carried away that they serve you your preferred food and give you hot water to bath during your first two days and you start making arrangement to relocate to their house, “Give it time.”

 

When a brother visits you and wakes you up by his shouting of prayer from 12 am to 6 am, please don't shut him down. First, “Give it time.”

 

When someone joins your fellowship in the first year and he is in every group/wing, please don't rush and make him a leader. Rather, “Give it time.”

 

When you enter a new environment and everybody worships you and eat your mess, don't be carried away. Just, “Give it time.”

 

When someone comes with a new business with unbelievable promises, before you involve your money, “Give it time.”

 

When you see a new church in town and you hear their waves, before you conclude about how hot they are, “Give it time.”

 

And when you are in a cross road of decisions, and you don't know what to do, ask the people or person involved to please, “Give you time.”

Being A Role Model

Dwight D. Eisenhower said, “Pull the string, and it will follow you wherever you wish. Push it, and it will go nowhere at all.”

 

So is being a role model, the most powerful form of education. Youngsters need good models more than they need critics. It's one of a parent's greatest responsibilities and opportunities. If you want others to follow your example, don't criticize or cajole them. Rather, live your own life in a manner that convincingly demonstrates both the virtue and success of your way of life. “May we live so that when people think of fairness, caring and integrity, they think of us.”

 

The Faithful Blind Chorister

Brother Joseph was a faithful blind chorister, who could out sing any Angel; and he was loved by everyone. He was also the second lieutenant in their band of prayer warriors. And his choir mistress always said to him, “Brother Joseph, never despair! Continue to have faith and be prayerful! For faith can conquer all!” So fasting, praying and going to the mountain, became his second nature.

 

One early morning, when he decided to visited his choir mistress at her house to share a testimony and she was still bathing, she said, “Come right in brother, I am almost done.” So Joseph came in, took a seat and waited patiently. But when she came out and realized that she hadn’t shaved, she just sat there and shaved her pubic hairs right before him while trying to make conversation. When done, she asked, “Brother Joseph, what brought you here this early morning? I hope everything is fine at home?” And he smiled and said, “Yes, very fine! I have just returned from the mountain, and I can see clearly now!”

Being Grateful

May today and every day, bring peace within us. May we have the ability to appreciate, trust and be grateful that we are exactly where we are meant to be, for a purpose; and that friends are quiet Angels, who lift us up to our feet, when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.

What Some Women Do

After dinner one evening, Mrs. Atakome who was heavily pregnant with their third child said to her husband, “Honey, I wish to thank you for sleeping on the couch this while, to avoid stressing me in my present condition. And in appreciate of your understanding, please take this Four Thousand naira to our neighbour’s wife, and she’ll allow you to sleep with her.”

 

With disbelief, but eager to satisfy his bottled up sexual desire, Mr. Atakome sheepishly took the money and headed to their neighbour’s wife. A few minutes later, he returned, gave the money back to his wife and said, “She said I have to pay Five Thousand naira before it will happen.” Mrs. Atakome angrily retorted, “Damn the ungrateful bitch! When she was pregnant last year, I collected only Three Thousand naira from her husband!!”

Do You Know

The word fuck comes from colonial times, when someone would be punished for 'prostitution'. It was an acronym for the words, “For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge.” FUCK was written on the stocks that held these criminals because For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge was too long to go on the stocks.

Check Your Birth Month _ September - December

September Born:

*Active and dynamic. *Decisive and hasty but tends to regret. *Attractive and affectionate. *Strong mentality. *Loves attention. *Diplomatic. *Consoling, friendly and solves other people's problems. *Brave and fearless. *Adventurous. *Loving and caring. *Suave and generous. *Usually have many friends. *Enjoys love. *Emotional. *Stubborn. *Hasty. *Good memory. *Moving, motivates oneself and others. *Loves to travel and explore. *Sometimes sexy in a way that only their lover can understand.

 

October Born:

*Loves to chat. *Loves those who love them. *Loves to takes things at the centre. *Inner and physical beauty. *Lies but doesn't pretend. *Gets angry often. *Treats friends importantly. *Brave and fearless. *Always making friends. *Easily hurt but recovers easily. *Daydreamer. *Opinionated. *Does not care to control emotions. *Unpredictable. *Extremely smart, but definitely the hottest and sexiest of them all.

 

November Born:

*Trustworthy and loyal. *Very passionate and dangerous. *Wild at times. *Knows how to have fun. *Sexy and mysterious. *Everyone is drawn towards his/her inner and outer beauty. *Independent personality. *Playful, but secretive. *Very emotional and temperamental sometimes. *Meets new people easily and very social in a group. *Fearless and independent. *Stands out in a crowd. *Essentially very smart. *Usually, the greatest men are born in this month.

 

December Born:

*Good looking and possibly maybe better than most. *Loyal and generous. *Patriotic. *Competitive in everything. *Active in games and interactions. *Impatient and hasty. *Ambitious. *Influential in organizations. *Fun to be with. *Easy to talk to, though hard to understand. *Thinks far with vision, yet complicated to know. *Easily influenced by kindness. *Polite and soft-spoken. *Having lots of ideas. *Sensitive. *Active mind. *Hesitating and tends to delay. *Choosy and always wants the best. *Temperamental. *Funny and humorous. *Loves to joke. *Good debating skills. *Has that someone always on his or her mind. * Talkative. *Daydreamer. *Friendly. *Knows how to make friends. *Abiding. *Able to show character. *One guy/girl kind of person. *Loveable. *Easily hurt.

Check Your Birth Month _ May - August

May Born:

*Stubborn and hard-hearted. *Strong-willed and highly motivated. *Sharp thoughts. *Easily angered. *Attracts others and loves attention. *Deep feelings. *Beautiful physically and mentally. *Firm standpoint. *Needs no motivation. *Shy towards opposite sex. *Easily consoled. *Systematic (left brain). *Loves to dream. *Strong clairvoyance. *Understanding. *Sickness usually in the ear and neck. *Good imagination. *Good physical. *Weak breathing. *Loves literature and the arts. *Loves travelling. *Dislike being at home. *Restless. *Not having many children. *Hardworking. *High spirited.

June Born:
*The best personality and are an absolute pleasure to be around. *Love to make new friends and outgoing. *A great flirt and more than likely have a very attractive partner. *Wicked. *Hottie. *More than likely have a massive record collection. *Have a great choice in films. *May one day become a famous actor/actress. *Have got the looks for it.

July Born:

*Fun to be with. *Secretive. *Difficult to fathom and to be understood. *Quiet unless excited or tensed. *Takes pride in oneself. *Has reputation. *Easily consoled. *Honest. *Concerned about other people's feelings. *Tactful. *Friendly. *Approachable. *Emotional, temperamental and unpredictable. *Easily hurt. *Witty and sparkly. *Snazzy at times. *Not revengeful. *Forgiving but never forgets. *Dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. *Guides others physically and mentally. *Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. *Caring and loving. *Treats others equally. *Strong sense of sympathy. *Wary and sharp. *Judges people through observations. *Hardworking. *No difficulties in studying. *Loves to be with friends. *Always broods about the past and old friends. *Waits for friends. *Never looks for friends. *Not aggressive unless provoked. *Loves to be loved. *Easily hurt and takes long to recover.

August Born:

*Outgoing personality. *Takes risks. *Feeds on attention. *No self control. *Kind hearted. *Self confident. *Loud and boisterous. *Very revengeful. *Easy to get along with and talk to. *Has an "every thing's peachy" attitude. *Likes talking and singing. *Loves music. *A daydreamer. *Easily distracted. *Hates not being trusted. *Big imagination. *Loves to be loved. *Hates studying. *In need of "that someone". *Longs for freedom. *Rebellious when withheld or restricted. *Lives by "no pain no gain". *Caring. *Always a suspect. *Playful. *Mysterious. *Charming or beautiful to everyone. *Stubborn. *Curious. *Independent. *Strong willed. *A fighter.

Check Your Birth Month _ January - April

January Born:

*Pretty/handsome. *Loves to dress up. *Easily bored. *Fussy. *Seldom shows emotions. *Takes time to recover when hurt. *Sensitive. *Down-to-Earth. *Stubborn.

February Born:
*Abstract thoughts. *Loves reality and abstract. *Intelligent and clever. *Changing personality. *Attractive. *Sexiest out of everyone. *Temperamental. *Quiet. *Shy and humble. *Honest and loyal. *Determined to reach goals. *Loves freedom. *Rebellious when restricted. *Loves aggressiveness. *Too sensitive and easily hurt. *Gets angry really easily but does not show it. *Dislikes unnecessary things

Loves making friends but rarely shows it. *Horny. *Daring and stubborn. *Ambitious. *Realizing dreams and hopes. *Sharp. *Loves entertainment and leisure. *Romantic on the inside not outside. *Superstitious and ludicrous. *Spendthrift. *Tries to learn to show emotions.

March Born:
*Attractive personality. *Sexy. *Affectionate Shy and reserved. *Secretive. *Naturally honest. *Generous and sympathetic. *Loves peace and serenity. *Sensitive to others. *Great kisser. *Easily angered. *Trustworthy. *Appreciative and returns kindness. *Hardly shows emotions. *Tends to bottle up feelings. *Observant and assesses others.

April Born:
*Suave and compromising. *Funny and humorous. *Stubborn. *Very talkative. *Calm and cool. *Kind and sympathetic. *Concerned and detailed. *Loyal. *Does work well with others. *Very confident. *Sensitive. *Positive Attitude. *Thinking generous. *Good memory. *Clever and knowledgeable. *Loves to look for information. *Able to cheer everyone up and/or make them laugh. *Able to motivate oneself and others. *Understanding. *Fun to be around. *Outgoing. *Hyper. *Bubbly personality. *Secretive. *Boy/girl crazy. *Loves sports, music, leisure and travelling. *Systematic, hot but has brains.

Some Random Facts_3

1.       In 2010, Utah executed an inmate by using a firing squad.

2.       In 2015, a German man celebrated his birthday for 46 hours, the longest birthday ever, by travelling across time zones.

3.       Some offshore dolphins were found with deep-sea fishes in their stomachs. This evidence suggests that offshore dolphins may dive to more than 500 m (1,600 ft).

4.       Unlike most fish, seahorses are covered in bony plates instead of scales.

5.       It takes about 0.2 seconds for your brain to recognize something touching your hand or foot.

6.       In 2004, a woman tried to use a fake million dollar bill to buy US$1,675 worth of merchandise at Wal-Mart and expected US$998,325 in change.

7.       The surname Beethoven meant “beet garden” in Dutch.

8.       In 2010, a Chicago Theatre company presented a version of Charles Dickens' "A Christmas Carol" in Klingon language and a Klingon setting.

9.       Houdini drew on his arsenal of magician's tricks to provide special instructions to American troops during WWI.

10.   In 1945, an airplane crashed into the Empire State Building. When rescuers attempted to rescue an elevator operator, the cable snapped, plunging her 75 stories down. She survived and still holds the record for longest survived elevator fall.

11.   Jack Kerouac typed his novel "On the Road" on a 120-foot roll of paper in 3 weeks.

The Bet/Vow That Wasn’t Honoured

"I am embarrassed to occupy the same space as some imbeciles and morons."

 

"Barbarians have taken over this community using the anonymity, most of the time, of the Internet to sit somewhere and start writing rubbish, questioning the right of people like me to express ourselves."

 

"What is the business of any stupid Nigerian to open his or her mouth to challenge my right? Did you get the green card for me? The arrogance of some Nigerians is overwhelming, and I don’t interfere, so how dare you interfere with me?" 

 

 "I should not be exiting the United States but Nigeria because the people on behalf of whom one has struggled all one’s life can be so slavish in mentality as to start querying the right of their champion to free speech.

 

~ Prof Wole Soyinka

 

(The worst thing to do to a critic is to criticize him)

THE  RESPONSE:

 

Dear Wole Soyinka,

 

Yes, I deliberately left out your well-worn title of 'Prof' in addressing you, for I find it totally impossible to equate someone who carries the title like a badge of honour (which it truly is, even though I have met a few with that title who barely qualify for one by their utterances and actions). 

 

And no, I proffer no apologies whatsoever for addressing you, sans title. 

 

You see, Wole Soyinka,  I might have trashed this latest ranting of yours along with the previous ones had you not dare to foolishly and stupidly referred to us Nigerians who dared stand up to you and asked that you live up to the bet you senselessly made, as 'stupid'. 

 

You see, because I am a Nigerian and certainly questioned the wisdom of a geriatric to first of all, make an unforced error by publicly betting on the electoral outcome of a land so far away and totally disconnected from the "people on behalf of whom one has struggled all one's life", and two, rather than live up to such ill-advised bet, you went on a wild goose chase of questioning the sanity of people who, out of their desire to see you retain a modicum of what's left of your dignity, I feel personally insulted by your "stupid Nigerians" comment. 

 

And I certainly do not respond quite well to personal insults.

 

As a matter of fact, like the geisha, I give a whole lot more than I have been attacked with. 

So pardon me (no, scratch that, I seek no pardon) for seeing your latest vituperation in the exact light it ought to be seen: the muddled production of a mind so befuddled by the vicissitude of advancing senility. 

 

For one thing, Soyinka, I think you overstate the importance of your Nobel Prize, extremely too highly. Otherwise, I do not think there's anything of note that you have done in your lifetime that would warrant you to collectively but arrogantly refer to a whole nation as "stupid". 

 

Yes, you're the only Nigerian to have ever been conferred with (not won, mind you) Nobel Prize. But may I remind you, Wole, there have been 29 other people conferred with that award since you last received (not won, I repeat) yours, four of them fellow Africans: one from Egypt and Mauritius each, and two from South Africa. 

 

Now, you know what's so remarkable about these other four (and in fact all the 113 people worldwide who have received the Nobel in Literature since Albert Nobel died and instituted it)? None of them has allowed the award to go to their heads. 

 

But of course these people are not Nigerians,  so they do not worship an almost worthless title. 

 

I mean, you got the Nobel in Literature, not in Medicine, Engineering or Nuclear Physics, for Pete's sake! What does it really take to be awarded these prizes? Write a few novels and blow some inconsequential grammar? Let me remind you, Wole, Bob Dylan, a regular folk who just happen to be a pop singer, got the most recent version of your award! Bob Dylan has never written a single novel nor is he known for blowing big grammar and manufacturing his own words! 

 

If that's not enough to tell you the award has very little or no significance,  listen to this: Bob Dylan has not deemed it fit to acknowledge or accept the over-rated thing, an act that perfectly reflects the worthlessness of the same thing for which you have developed a big head and talk down on your fellow countrymen. 

 

Get real, Wole Soyinka; you went and brought an ant infested wood into your house, it is only natural that you would have lizards struggling for the same space with you. 

 

You say do not interfere in the life of Nigerians, and you wonder how dare they interfere with yours? Wole, I know with advancing senility comes forgetfulness so I'd forgive for forgetting that your life has been one of interfering with that of Nigerians - right from the Gowon days till the last administration of Jonathan. 

 

And no, Nigerians did not get the green card for you. Neither did the Ghanaians from whose territory you chose to make it public that you would tear your green card if Donald Trump wins. Now, what business has anyone with you tearing or throwing away your green card? Why did you choose to make such childish tantrum public? 

 

For a supposedly well-lettered fellow like yourself, I'm dumbfounded that you would call the internet "anonymous". Perhaps I need to educate you a little here: there's nothing anonymous about the internet or the social media. As a matter of fact, the internet disrobes you of your anonymity once you sign on into it. 

 

Type in my name now and you'll most likely find the story of my entire life on there. 

 

So, Wole, nobody hides behind the anonymity of the internet to write anything. And yes, just like you have questioned the right of leaders past to do what they do, questioning your right (not your right to freedom of expression) comes with the territory. 

 

So you're embarrassed to occupy the same space with "imbeciles" and "morons"? That's no problem.  At 82, you won't have much to tolerate them. Nature will soon take you away from this land of imbeciles and morons, to a land filled with dead and tired imbecilic geriatrics like yourself. 

 

Thank you for reading this rather long response to your unprovoked tantrums. I hold forth no apologies for its length; that is the writing style that got you your notoriety the first place!

 

Yours sincerely, 

One of the Stupid Nigerians You Referenced.