Her Supple Demand

After a wife had continuously nibbled on her husband’s ear that woke him from a deep slumber, she whispered, “Honey, guess what?” And when the husband asked, “What,” she excitedly said, “I have just had a dream that you bought me a diamond necklace with a pair of diamond ear rings!” And he said, “Very well, darling! Now, you can go back to sleep and wear them!!”

On Love

Love is not just an emotional titillation, for there is the dutiful responsibility of love as well. Unlike in our modern cultures where we tend to use the word love univocally, ancient Greeks stratified the definition of love. They understood and practiced the definition of love in terms of responsibilities and configurations of relationships. So they had a term for friendship love, another for parental love, for sexual love, and for love of the gods. The word “Philadelphia” came from the Greek stratification of love. It means “brotherly.” The word erotic came from the Greek word “eros,” which refers to sexual love. The Greek word for parental love was “storge.” And the word for love of the gods was “agape.”

All the above four ancient Greek definitions of love come into play in marriage. There’s friendship love in marriage. It’s why you go to movies together, play together, and chat together. There’s parental love in marriage. It’s why you take care of each other. It’s the love of care and protection. There’s of course erotic love in relationships. It’s what governs sensuality, sex and its eroticism. But then, there’s the love of the gods called agape. It’s unconditional love. The whole concept about agape is that the gods are so far removed from us they’re unmoved by what we do. The agape type of love is very critical in relationships. It’s being able to accept people despite themselves. And so, all four Greek notions of love have to be present in a relationship if it’s to succeed. There has to be care, friendship, sex and unconditional acceptance in relationships.

A Better World Made Easy

Isn’t making a better world easy, interesting? It sure is, and it is surely achievable using our power of thought; considering the fact that all and every creation in and including nature, are the results of thought. Yes, it is easy; and just as it is easier for you to think of raising a finger and then raising it, than making others raise theirs. Every day and everywhere you go, you hear people say, “I want a peaceful world, I want honest people, I want truthful people, I want a good, caring and loving woman, and I want a good, caring and loving man.” Beautiful requirements you have, yes? But have you thought of being a peaceful, honest, truthful, good, caring and loving person; that you may meet the requirements of your requirements?

Some Random Facts_18

1.       Lobsters eat each other.

2.       Paper cuts hurt so much because they bleed very little, if at all, leaving the skins pain receptors open to air.

3.       For several months in 1969, the torrent of water rushing over American Falls, one of three waterfalls that make up Niagara Falls, was reduced to almost nothing.

4.       NASA recovered metal from the WTC and used it on Martian rovers as a tribute to those fallen on the 9/11 attacks.

5.       Babies have accents. French babies cry will end with a rising note, while German babies have a dropping note at the end of theirs. They pick up on this in the womb.

6.       The first recorded speculative economic bubble was the Tulip Mania, in the Dutch Republic. At its peak in 1637, a single tulip bulb sold for more than 10 times the annual income of a skilled crafts worker.

7.       There's a 10 ft (3m) wall in Lima, Peru, that separates one of the wealthiest neighbourhoods from one of the poorest.

8.       If you count the number of seconds that pass between a flash of lightning and the crack of thunder that follows it, and divide it by five, that's how many miles away you are from where lightning just struck.

Having Thank You Thoughts

Denise P. Kimbro  said, “Life is 10% what happen to us and 90% how we react to it“

Life is more meaningful when we always link our thoughts to good purposes, while discarding all those thoughts of no goodness; because there are so many things to be thankful for. To start with, we should be thankful that every day we have a golden opportunity to wake up to another new day. We should be thankful for all the good things that are happening in our lives, and all around us. Similarly, we should also be thankful for all the bad things happening in our lives and all around us, for they give us the opportunity to learn what went wrong, that we may work on improving them.

When our thoughts are always filled with goodness and thankfulness, there shall be no room for negativity; and we shall be able to make this world a better place as envisaged by our Creator. So start being thankful to our Creator, all those who are there when you need them, all those who came to your life to make you who you are today, all those who care to listen, all those who make you feel worthy, and even all those who dislike you, for that has made you or will make you be a stronger and better person.

The Power Of Thought

Dalai Lama XIV said, “One small positive thought in the morning, can change your entire day.”

Thought is an imaginary thinking within us that is projected outside, and has a force and energy to vibrate and form a will that evolves. Thought is therefore the ability to use our minds to consider something, and process it into an idea that can become the product of what we are thinking about. And by extension, thought is cause, experience and effect. And that also means, “If we don’t like the results in our lives, we have to change the way we think.”

Although thinking is considered an essential action in every human, there is no set rule on how to use our power of thought. According to some other definitions, thought underlies many human actions and interactions in understanding its physical and metaphysical origins, and the  processes and effects that  have been longstanding goals in academic disciplines including linguistics, psychology, neuroscience, philosophy, medicine, arts, biology, sociology and cognitive science. May you be granted the ability to use your power of thought for the good of mankind, and to the glory of your Creator.

A Bad Bet

While a husband and wife were both reading in bed, the husband turned to his wife and said, “Honey, I’ll bet you can’t tell me something that would make me happy and sad at the same time.” And the wife asked, “What?” And the husband repeated, “I’ll bet you can’t tell me something that would make me happy and sad at the same time.” The wife then looked at him and said, “You have the biggest penis out of all your friends.”

Some Random Facts_17

1.       Surfing will make its debut as an Olympic sport in Tokyo 2020.

2.       There are no reported cases of runners dying of dehydration during marathons, but there are plenty of cases of runners dying from water intoxication.

3.       A record $4.79 billion was spent on 14,591 soccer player deals globally in 2016, according to FIFA. That's about $328,000 per average deal.

4.       Max Factor, an early 20th-century makeup artist to Hollywood actors, coined the noun "makeup."

5.       In Quito, Ecuador, a group of vigilantes known as "Acción Ortográfica Quito" go around correcting all the bad grammar they find in graffiti.

6.       Italy's highest court ruled in 2016 that stealing small amounts of food to stave off hunger is not a crime.

7.       Migrating to another country increases the amount of dopamine in the brain, putting immigrants at higher risk for developing schizophrenia.

8.       Retroviruses, the virus family that includes HIV, are nearly half a billion years old.

The Great Lie

If you live our prescribed moral life, deny yourself pleasures, follow our prescribed rituals and give us enough money, you'll have a decent shot at being accepted into Heaven.

Make A Difference

You don’t have to be strong, brilliant, rich, beautiful or perfect, to make a difference in someone’s life. Start with being honest, fair, understanding and supportive.

A Mother, Defines Marriage

When a young lady went to her mother and asked, “Mom, what is marriage?” The mother smiled knowingly, placed an arm on her daughter’s shoulder and responded, “My dear, marriage is just another fancy word for adopting an overgrown male child who cannot be handled by his parents anymore.”

Some Interesting Definitions

1.       Tears: Tears are the hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine water-power.

2.       Yawn: A Yawn is the only time some married men ever get to open their mouths.

3.       Marriage: Marriage is an agreement in which a man loses his Bachelor Degree, and a woman gains her Masters.

4.       Conference Room: A Conference Room is a place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.

5.       School: A School is a place where parents pay and children play.

6.       Father: A Father is a Banker provided by Nature.

7.       Life Insurance: A Life Insurance is a contract that keeps you poor all your life, so that you can die Rich.

8.       Nurse: A Nurse is a person who wakes you up to give you sleeping pills.

9.       Doctor: A doctor is one who holds your ills with pills, and kills you will bills.

10.   Boss: A boss is someone who is early when you are late, and late when you are early.

11.   Politician: A politician is one who shakes your hands before elections, and shakes your confidence thereafter.

12.   Criminal: A criminal is no different from the rest, except that he or she got caught.

Why We Must Seek Solutions In Our Roots

They say, “What you are going to Sokoto to look for, is in your sokoto (trousers).”  And here is African Science at work when two guys snatched a car at gun point, and drove away. The next day, they returned the car to the exact crime scene, suddenly went gaga and removed their clothes, started cleaning the car, and bathing themselves with dirty water from the gutter. Who says African scientific insurance no pass Oyinbo science? Haven’t we been gullible enough? Feel free to request for video.

A True Love

A true love is someone who would understand that you are not perfect, and would still love to be with you. Someone who would appreciate that you are only human, for humans are bound to make mistakes. And what really matters is the unconditional feelings you have for each other.

Some Random Facts_16

1.       The word "weather" originally just meant "wind."

2.       The "Bitcoin Faucet" website, created by former lead developer of Bitcoin, handed out 10,000 free bitcoins to visitors. That's about $44 million today.

3.       The 20 richest soccer clubs, all European, earned 7.4 billion euros in the 2015/16. Sponsorships and merchandise accounted for 43% of it, broadcast rights 39%, and ticket sales 18%.

4.       Estimates suggest the flooding caused by the tropical storm Harvey could destroy up to $20 billion in insured property, making it one of the costliest storms in US history.

5.       Donald Trump installed goats on his New Jersey golf courses to get them designated as agricultural properties to lower his property taxes.

6.       Iceland has one of the largest gun ownership rates in the world and one of the lowest crime rates as well.

7.       Punk rock was born at a cinema matinee in Peru in the 1960s.

8.       Mississippi elected the first African American to serve in the U.S. Congress already in 1870.

Her Body’s Most Sensitive Part

After wining and dining his date and while cuddling on the couch, the guy suddenly sat up and asked, “Lady, what is the matter with you? I have kissed and touched you almost everywhere, but you are not responding.  So, what is the most sensitive part of your body?” And smiling mischievously, the lady replied, “They are the palms of my hands! Anytime money touches them, my entire body becomes active!!”

Some Random Quotes_6

1.       Never ever give in, in nothing great or small, large or petty; except to convictions of honour and good sense, though we can't solve all problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.

2.       It’s in your own interest to always forget those who have hurt you, but never forget those who love you every day.

3.       Always forget the past that makes you cry, that you may enjoy the present that makes you smile.

4.       Integrity is telling your-self the truth, honesty is telling the truth to other people, and honesty is the first chapter in the book of wisdom.

5.       Instead of thinking about where you are, think about where you want to be; for there are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind.

6.       It takes a great many years of hard work to become an overnight success.

7.       You must give everything to make your life as beautiful as the dreams that dance in your imagination.

8.       No one should be ashamed to admit they are wrong, which is but saying in other words, that they are wiser today than they were yesterday.

9.       The best way to have the last word is to apologize.

10.   Joy and hope are never separate, for you will never find a hopeful person who was depressed or a joyful person who had lost hope.

Her Acceptable Polygamy

A man came home one day, went straight to his wife, hugged and kissed her, and said, “Honey, I’m so happy for you have been a very lovely and caring wife; and I wish to marry a second wife.” As the wife sternly stared into his eyes, he added,“ And I have taken the liberty to buy you a brand new Mercedes SUV 2018 edition, bought us a much bigger and lavishly furnished house in the Island and credited your domiciliary account with One Hundred Thousand Dollars.” The wife now place her head on his shoulder and prayed, “The good Lord will continue to bless and favour you like He did Uncle Solomon.”

On Value Appreciation

Coins always make sounds, but the currency notes are always silent.  So when your value increases, keep quiet and be thankful.

Have a blessed Sunday.

Don’t Mess With Grandpa

When the Inland Revenue Service decided to audit a Grandpa, and summoned him to their office, Grandpa showed up with his attorney. The Revenue auditor said, “Well, Sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explained by saying that you win money by gambling. I’m not sure this department finds that believable.” And Grandpa said, “I’m a great gambler, and I can prove it. Would you like a demonstration?” The auditor thought for a moment and said, “Okay, go ahead.” Grandpa then said, I’ll bet you a thousand dollars I can bite my own eye.” The auditor thought for another moment and said, “It’s a bet.” When Grandpa then removed his glass eye and bit it, the auditor’s jaw dropped.

Then Grandpa said, “Now, I’ll bet you thousand dollars that I can bite my other eye.” Since the auditor could tell that Grandpa wasn’t blind, he took the bet. Grandpa then removed his dentures and bit his good eye. The auditor now realizing he has wagered and lost three thousand dollars with Grandpa’s attorney as witness, he started to get nervous. Grandpa then asked, “Do you want to go for double or nothing? I’ll bet you six thousand dollars that I can stand on one side of your desk, and pee into that wastebasket on the other side, and never get a drop anywhere in between.” The auditor, who has by now been twice burned, was cautious but he looked carefully and decided there’s no way this old guy could possibly manage that stunt, so he agreed again.

Grandpa then stood beside the desk and unzips his pants, but although he strained mightily, he couldn’t make the stream reach the wastebasket on the other side, so he pretty much urinated all over the auditor’s desk. The auditor leaped with joy, realizing that he has just turned a major loss into a huge win. But Grandpa’s attorney moaned and put his head in his hands. So the auditor asked the attorney, “Are you okay?” And the attorney replied, “Not really! This morning when Grandpa told me he’d been summoned for an audit, he bet me twenty-five thousand dollars that he could come in here and pee all over your desk, and that you’d be happy about it.”

A Dangerous Addiction

When a lady applicant who was addicted to listening to other people’s conversation boarded an Ikeja/Obalende bus, she had the intention of getting off at Yaba for an interview. But while seated behind two ladies and listening to their conversations, she lost track of time and direction, went through Yaba, dropped off with the two ladies at Marina, and was sheepishly following them just to hear the rest of the story. And not until the two ladies suddenly and dramatically stopped, causing the lady applicant bumping into them, did she come to her senses.

On Destiny

Destiny belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams, and the courage to pursue them. So, never stop when you are tired, stop only when you are done.

Some Random Facts_15

1.       From 2000 to 2010, some 100,000 British people converted to Islam.

2.       The main actor of “The Gods Must Be Crazy” was only paid $300, even though the film made over $60 million.

3.       Rock Paper Scissors was invented in China, but popularized in Japan, where it's called "Janken."

4.       Saltwater crocodiles enjoy catching a wave and can travel hundreds of kilometres by "surfing" on ocean currents.

5.       It is estimated that 9 out of 10 women in Mexico have been subjected to sexual violence, whether on the streets or at home.

6.       'Orchid' actually means testicle. The surgical procedure to remove one or more testicles is an 'orchidectomy'.

7.       In Aztec cities, chewing tzicli (chewing gum) in public identified a married or widowed woman as a prostitute and a man as a homosexual.

8.       More than a third of all sick leave is taken on a Monday, researchers found.

A Pure Heart

A pure heart is the greatest temple in the world. Don’t believe the smiling face, but believe the smiling heart; they are very rare in this world. Have a blessed day!

My Missed Opportunity

While I was passing through town and arrived at a friend’s home, he said to me, “You will either sleep on the couch, or you sleep with baby.” I had a quick think in my head, “Babies pee in bed and sometimes cry at night,” so I said, “I shall sleep on the couch.” The next morning, a beautiful, slim and tall girl with 38D breasts, 24” waist and 34” hips; the type who walks into a room and everyone say, “Oh My God,” walked in and greeted me, “Happy morning, Sir! I’m Betty, the Maid of the house, but everyone calls me Baby here, and you?" I looked sheepishly at her and said, “Just call me, Idiot!”

Some Random Quotes_5

1.       Beautiful young people are acts of nature, but beautiful old people are works of art.

2.       Learn from the mistakes of others, because you can't live long enough to make them all yourself.

3.       Though the tongue weighs practically nothing, so few people can hold it.

4.       No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

5.       It is better to remain silent at the risk of being thought a fool, than to talk and remove all doubt of it.

6.       For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone.

7.       Work like you don't need the money. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like nobody's watching.

8.       In helping others, we shall help ourselves; for whatever good we give out completes the circle and comes back to us.

9.       Nothing liberates our greatness like the desire to help and the desire to serve.

10.   The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

Some Cardinal Rules In Life

1.       Always make peace with your past, so it won’t screw up your present.

2.       Never worry about what others think of you, because it is none of your business.

3.       Time heals almost everything, so give it time.

4.       Never compare your life to others, and don’t judge them. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

5.       Stop thinking too much, for it’s alright not to know the answers. They will come to you when you least expect them.

6.       Appreciate that no one is in charge of your happiness, but you.

7.       So smile! You don’t own all the problems in this world!!