1. Some people love to spend lots of money buying new clothes but the best moments in life are enjoyed without clothes.
2. Having a cold drink on a hot day with few friends is nice, but having a hot friend on a cold night after a few drinks, is priceless.
3. Condoms don't guarantee safe sex anymore; a friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot dead by the woman's husband.
4. Arguing over a girl’s breast size is like choosing between Star, Guilder, Fosters, Carlsberg and Budweiser. Men may state their preferences, but will grab whatever is available.
5. Newton committed suicide when he saw a complete naked girl, and observed something going up in his pant, against his own laws of gravity.
6. Vegetarian women are silent during sex because they are in state of shock that a piece of meat can give so much pleasure.
7. Breasts are located in the upper half of a woman's body because milk should be kept away from the pussy.
8. A blowjob is the only job in the world that can't be included in your resume despite years of experience and a number of references.
9. If you have two balls between your legs it means you are a man. But if you have four, it does not mean that you are a superman. You must've guessed by now that someone's taking your ass.
10. Bio teacher: Girls, the size of a penis should be 2.5 inches for successful penetration.
Girl: Ma'am, how about 9 inches?
Teacher: I was talking of necessity not luxury.
11. All medicines have Side effects, only VIAGRA has Front effect.
12. Burning love is when at night you reached out for the Vaseline gel and pick up Vicks by mistake
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