When a senior military officer was admitted in a military hospital for
treatment of a minor malady, he made a complete nuisance of himself by
irritating both the staff and the other patients. He did not only demand attention,
he expected every order of his to be followed immediately. He was in a six-man
ward rather than a private room. He would complain that his meals were too cold
or not served to suit his taste, the light needed to be adjusted as he wish,
the night time activities interfered with his rest, and on, and on. One afternoon
an orderly entered the room, went to the officer and said, "Time to take
your temperature, sir." After growling at the orderly, the officer opened
his mouth to accept the thermometer.
But the orderly said, "Sorry sir, but for this test we need your
temperature from the other end." When a whole new barrage of verbal abuse
followed, the orderly was insistent that a rectal temperature was what the test
called for. The officer at last rolled over, bared his ass, and allowed the
orderly to proceed. The orderly then told him, "Stay exactly like that and
don't move. I'll be back in five minutes to check up on you." An hour
later, the head nurse entered the room, saw the officer with his bare ass in
the air and gasped, "What's going on here?" And the officer barked,
"Haven't you ever seen someone having their temperature taken?" The
head nurse responded, "Yes sir, I have! But not with a pink rose!!"
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