Uncanny Way To Tie A Tie

On the day of my big job interview, I woke up late. And as I frantically threw on a suit, I exclaimed, “Oh no, my tie!” You see, my Dad was out of town and wasn’t there to help me, and for the life of me I did not know how to tie a tie. So I grabbed a tie and ran out the door. “Excuse me sir,” I said to the crossing guard, “I have an important job interview. Can you please help me make this tie?” The guard replied, “Sure. Just lie down on this bench.”

Well, if someone was going to help me, I wasn’t going to ask any questions. After he finished and the tie looked good, I just had to ask why I had to lie down. He replied, “Well, in my previous job I learned how to tie ties on other people when they were lying down.” And when I incredulously asked, “What was your previous job?” He simply replied, “I ran a morgue.”