Some Interesting Human Facts

1.       Men spend almost a year of their lives staring at women.

2.       Half of all women who die from homicide are killed by their current or former husbands or partners.

3.       Men lie 6 times a day, twice as often as women.

4.       If your laptop feels hot, don't put it on your lap if you're a man, it may cause infertility.

5.       In his lifetime, a man spends almost six months shaving.

6.       Men with shaved heads are perceived as an inch taller and 13% stronger than men with hair.

7.       Men with attractive wives report higher levels of satisfaction with their marriages.

8.       Your shoes are the first thing people subconsciously notice about you.

9.       If you sit for more than 11 hours a day, there's a 50% chance that it will make you severely sick in 2 yrs.

10.   There are at least 6 people in the world who look exactly like you. There's a 9% chance that you'll meet one of them in your lifetime.

11.   Sleeping without a pillow reduces back pain and keeps your spine stronger.

12.   A person's height is determined by their father, and their weight is determined by their mother.

13.   If a part of your body "falls asleep, you can almost always wake it up, by shaking your head.

14.   There are three things the human brain cannot resist noticing - Food, attractive people and danger

15.   Right-handed people tend to chew food on their right side

16.   Putting dry tea bags in gym bags or smelly shoes will absorb the unpleasant odour.

17.   According to Albert Einstein, if honey bees were to disappear from earth, humans would be dead within 4 years.

18.   There are so many kind of apples, that if you ate a new one everyday, it would take over 20 years to try them all.

19.   You can survive without eating for weeks, but you will only live 11 days without sleeping.

20.   People who laugh a lot are healthier than those who don't.

21.   Laziness and inactivity kills just as many people as smoking.

What Causes Mad Cow Disease?

When a sexy female TV reporter with big boobs, who was preparing her article on the cause of Mad Cow Disease, she went to interview a farmer and said to the farmer, “Sir, we are here to get some information on what causes Mad Cow Disease. We shall appreciate any ideas you may have." And the farmer asked, "Do you know that a Bull screws a Cow only once a year?” Though a bit embarrassed, the reporter replied, "Well, that's a piece of valuable information. But what's the relation between this phenomenon and Mad Cow Disease?"

But the farmer continued, "Well Madam, do you know that we milk the Cow twice a day?" And blushingly, the reporter said, "Sir, this is really another great piece of information. What about the Mad Cow Disease?" And staring at her big tits, the farmer responded, "I am getting to the point madam. If I was playing with your boobs twice a day, and screwing you only once a year, wouldn't you get MAD?"

Her Tithing Source

One Sunday, while counting the money in the weekly offering, the pastor found a pink envelope containing $1000. When this happened again the next week, the pastor watched as the offering was being collected, the following Sunday. As he watched, he saw a little old lady put the distinctive pink envelope in the plate.

This went on for several weeks until the pastor, overcome by curiosity, approached her and said, "Ma'am, I couldn't help but notice that you put $1,000 every week in the collection plate." The old lady smiled and said, “Oh yes, every week my son sends me money, and from it I pay my tithe to the church." When the pastor asked, “How much does he send you?" The old lady replied, "$10,000 a week." Amazed, the pastor asked, “What does he do for a living?" The old lady proudly replied, “He is a business man. He tells people how to make quick money.”

And God Said

A very religious man lived right next door to an atheist. While the religious man prayed day in, day out, and was constantly on his knees in communion with his Lord, the atheist never even looked twice at a church. However, the atheist's life was good, he had a well-paying job and a beautiful wife, and his children were healthy and good-natured; whereas the pious man's job was strenuous and his wages were low, his wife was cheating on him and his kids wouldn't give him the time of the day.

So one day, deep in prayer as usual, he raised his eyes towards heaven and asked, "Oh God, I honour you every day, I ask your advice for every problem and confess to you my every sin. Yet my neighbour who doesn't even believe in you and certainly never prays, is blessed with every happiness while I go poor and suffer many indignities. Why is this?" And a great voice was heard from above and God said, "BECAUSE HE DOESN'T BOTHER ME ALL THE TIME."

Ignorance Cost

One evening when a daughter brought her new boyfriend home to meet her parents, her parents were appalled by his appearance, because he had tattoos, pierced nose, and was wearing a leather jacket and motorcycle boots. Later, the parents pulled their daughter aside and in confessing their concern diplomatically, the mother said, "Dear, he doesn't seem like a very nice guy."

And the daughter asked, "Oh please, Mom, if he wasn't nice, why would he be doing 500 hours of community service?"

How She Cares

One day, a husband phoned his wife and said, “Honey, I got hit by a car outside of the office, and Josephine brought me to the hospital. After making tests and taking X-rays, the doctor said the blow to my head though very strong, will not have any serious or lasting injuries. But I have three broken ribs, a broken arm, a compound fracture in my left leg, and they may have to amputate the right foot.”

And his wife asked, “Who is Josephine?”

The Blonde’s Alligator Shoes

While vacationing in an alligator territory, a young blonde felt it was a great opportunity to own a pair of genuine alligator shoes. But she was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. And after becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!" The shopkeeper said, "By all means. Be my guest. Maybe you'll be so lucky and catch yourself a big one!" Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching herself an alligator.

Later in the day, the shopkeeper was driving home, when he spotted the young woman standing waist deep in the water with a shotgun in hand. Just then, he saw a huge 9-foot alligator swimming quickly towards her. She took aim, killed the creature and with a great deal of effort hauled it on to the swamp bank. And laid nearby were several more of the dead creatures. The shopkeeper watched in amazement. Just then the blonde flipped the alligator on its back and angrily, she exclaimed, "Damn it! This one isn't wearing any shoes either!"